Wednesday, April 29, 2015

The Wedding: Finding a Venue

I usually don't like the "keep calm" things but this is just super applicable to my life right now.
(Spoiler alert, we haven't found a venue yet.)
Wedding Wednesday is a thing, right? I remember seeing lots of those posts in the past but I don't know if people still do it. Maybe all the engaged bloggers I followed got married? Or maybe the engaged people I follow are actually able to talk and blog and think about things that aren't wedding related? If those kinds of people are out there, can you tell me how you do it? Because for the past two weeks every single night as I've tried to drift off to sleep I've just been consumed by thoughts of the wedding, and usually I start thinking so hard that I can't sleep so I have to play candy crush but then I run out of lives so I go on Buzzfeed but then I'll have already read all the articles I care about so I'll go on Pinterest and then BAM! there are my 47 billion wedding boards and... the cycle is vicious.
Don't get me wrong, I'm so thrilled and excited, but I also don't feel like I was prepared for the amount of stress that comes with wedding planning. How come nobody makes this clear? Is it like childbirth, where after it's over all you remember is that at the end you got a beautiful baby and all the pain goes away? Well, lucky for me I have this blog so I'll be able to remember every little annoying detail.
And so will you! You're so lucky.
Like, I'll be able to remember how I have an ideal date in mind (October 17 of this year, but for some reason I feel very uncomfortable putting that in writing, like if I do people will steal it or I won't be allowed to get married on any other date), but apparently when your date is in less than 6 months, affordable wedding venues are hard to find.
First, we talked about getting married in the garden where my sister got married. I called, and it's not available in October. Then, I called our second choice, which is under $1000 but has no parking because it's in downtown San Luis, but they don't have any availability until April of 2016. So, ok fine, my top two choices aren't available when I want them, but there have to be a bunch of venues around SLO, right? Finding a wedding venue should be pretty easy, RIGHT? RIGHT, ELLE WOODS?
Absolutely. There are so many choices! And so many barns! (FYI, a barn is to a California wedding what The Plaza is to a NYC wedding... at least according to Bride Warss.) So I started happy clicking on all these venues, looking at beautiful pictures of happy wedding parties, pretty little lights strung all over rustic barns, and all the mason jars and burlap your pretty little heart could desire.
And then I started looking for prices. Anne Hathaway does a pretty good impression of my feelings after seeing the $19k price tags. I'm not even kidding. NINETEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS, and that's just for the venue and space heaters at an additional charge.

(I googled "devastation gif" and this is what I got. At least something I'm finding on the internet is helpful.)
And that's basically where we are right now. Square One. Unless there's a square that comes before one? Is there? Square Prequel? That's where we are.
Actually maybe that's a lie. We have decided on our engagement photographer, and I decided what kind of flower girl Baby Kate should wear. Want to see? Okay fine, you talked me into it.


So thanks for reading my panic attack of a post. I will gladly accept words of encouragement, hilarious gifs, bottles of wine, cash, and popcorn (but only if it's the movie theater butter kind, not the light butter garbage I ate last night) and links to helpful blog posts to help me feel better. Thanks and bye gotta go google more panic inducing venues.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

These TV shows just need to END

Guys, it's ok, this post isn't wedding related AT ALL. I swear. No, this post is aaaaaalllll about television so buckle your seatbelts. Or don't, because you probably don't need to. I don't speed.
When Parenthood ended I was devastated, like everybody else. After the finale ended I cried for over an hour. If you don't believe me you can ask Keith. I SOBBED. BUT. In addition to my devastation, I was really glad that the show ended before it had a chance to just get stupid and ridiculous like so many other shows out there. I feel like it saved some of the integrity of the show, and when I think about it I don't think, "Ugh, Parenthood. It was so good until  so-and-so happened and blah blah blah."
BRB, gotta grab the tissues.

Today I'd like to tell you about all the shows I still watch but mostly only out of obligation. Every new episode I watch I'm like, "Geez this show is stupid and it really needs to end I HATE IT." So read at your own risk because there will probably be spoilers for Grey's Anatomy, Scandal, Revenge, and whatever else I feel like talking about.
I loved the first two seasons of Scandal. It was such a great show and whenever big bombshells were dropped (Mama and Papa Pope were both alive????) my mouth would fall open, I would audibly gasp, and then I'd scour the internet for any and all fan theories about what would happen next. I think I made it through the first two seasons in less than a week, and I ate popcorn and red wine for dinner multiple times just wishing I could be like Olivia Pope. 
But now? I feel like Shonda Rhimes is just pushing an agenda, especially with the The Lawn Chair episode. And it also really bugs me that she's having the conservative Republican president basically be a horrible person who cheats on his wife and starts wars to save his mistress. Am I reading too much into it? I really don't think so. Also, Papa Pope's monologues are getting to be too much and Liv's outfits aren't impressing me anymore. 
However, drunk and depressed Mellie may have been the best thing to happen to Scandal like, ever. Also, I still covet Liv's wine glasses though. OMG I just realized I can totally put them on my registry!!!! (Sorry for the accidental wedding talk.)
Grey's Anatomy
It would honestly shock me if there's anyone out there who still looks forward to this show. If you're out there, show yourself! In my opinion Grey's should have ended prior to the plane crash, and Mark and Lexie never should have died. They should have finally figured their sh*t out and lived happily ever after like they deserved. Maybe I still get choked up about that, I'll never tell. Maybe I'm choked up just typing this. 
I'm so sick of all the Meredith/Derek drama, Seriously, Meredith is a whiny little baby and I know she says she's all "dark and twisty" but at some point you just have to overcome it, MER. Especially if you're planning on raising two babies. Stop with the drama and just live happily ever after with McDreamy and your babies, and stop whining.
And Alex and Jo, can you please just get married already???
And everybody else can just leave, except for Amelia because I love her hair more than anything else on the show.
Now, I've never been a fan of soap operas (except for a 3 month period in high school when I was obsessed with General Hospital), but Revenge seems more ridiculous than all soap operas (english and spanish combined), and I only watch it now out of habit. I started watching this show right after I finished with Scandal, and my feelings about it are really similar: it sucks. BUT, my mind was totally blown the other day when I found out that Charlotte is the same person who played young Jennifer Garner in 13 Going on 30, but other than that I just hate it. It's too convenient that Nolan can do basically anything with his magic computer, and did you know he's over 40 and he was the guy in Josie and the Pussycats???
ANYWAY,  David Clark might just be the worst character ever (his raspy strained voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard) and I feel lno connection to him whatsoever and if he died (for real, not a fake death like before), I wouldn't be sad. Emily/Amanda's non existent top lip really bothers me, and Victoria's man hands distract me from the "plot" ALL THE TIME. And Victoria, enough with the bandage dresses.
Ok, now you all know how petty, shallow, and catty I can be, so tell me if you agree with anything. OR tell me if there are any shows I didn't mention that I should have. OR tell me if there are any shows that don't suck that I should watch because I'm always open to suggestions.
Honorable mentions: Gotham, because Ben Mackenzie is trying too hard and most of the characters are really annoying; The Big Bang Theory because even though it still cracks me up it's really just recycled material; Once Upon a Time, which I'm not invested enough to write about but I don't enjoy it anymore; and Nashville just because I miss Juliette Barnes from the first few seasons.

How I feel about wedding planning a week into being engaged

I've been engaged in almost a week now and already this stage of life has been more stressful than my last semester of college, than trying to find a job, and than trying to curl the eyelashes of a friend on her wedding day. About that last one, have you ever tried to curl someone else's lashes? It's HARD. I'd suggest you try it but I don't want to put the delicate eyelids of some poor unsuspecting souls at risk so just learn from my mistakes and don't ever do it.
Being able to look at my ring any time I want to has helped calm me down, but it's also proved to be dangerous when I'm driving and the sun hits it at any angle and I'm blinded and forget to pay attention to the road. Thank god for small towns and a 6 minute commute to work.
I was going to instagram this picture but decided it won't be worthy of The Instagram until there's the basic blogging white background, a couple of bridal magazines, and maybe a mug of coffee or a gold glittery pen in the picture also. Now that I'm engaged I like, really care about aesthetics.
The most common question I've gotten when telling people the news is: "Do you have a date yet?"
And the answer is both yes and no. I have a date in mind that I really want (I'd say we both want it but let's be real...) but the venue I wanted isn't available that weekend and nobody seems to think I'm being serious when I say, "But couldn't they just squeeze us in for like, 2 hours on that Saturday? I'm low maintenance, I'm sure we can be done by then." Apparently a wedding is an all-day affair (unless you elope like the Hagans and Jen.)
The day after the proposal I created a wedding e-mail addres, signed up for The Knot and Wedding Wire, entered in the wedding date, and was shocked and appalled to see the website tell me, "You currently have thirty-nine tasks overdue." But I literally got engaged 18 hours again how exactly was I supposed to complete 39 tasks in 18 hours while I was busy staring at my ring and telling people my news? And then I took a nap.
Two days after the engagement my aunt called me and proceeded to rapid fire these questions at me:
Where are you going on the honeymoon? Uhhhh IDK somewhere that isn't a beach.
Will you wear a veil? Yes.
What will the veil look like? a veil, probably.
What's your budget? .....
What shoes will you wear? ...sandals?
Which caterer will you choose? important is a caterer, actually?
What about the flowers? Cheap ones.
Did you decide on a DJ yet? Yes and his name is iPod.

So naturally after these two instances the most appropriate course of action was for my brothers and sister-in-law to come visit me and for the four of us to eat waffles that would have made Leslie Knope pass out from the ecstasy.
If you come visit I'll take you to this place. It's a waffle with ice cream inside and hot fudge, whipped cream, marshmallow topping, and crack graham cracker dust on top. #sheddingforthewedding

And then I started looking up venues and caterers and photographers and dresses and I started thinking that maybe having this wedding for under $2k isn't going to happen. But - and you should all be proud of this - instead of curling up in a ball in the corner chugging wine from the bottle, I decided to just call it quits on the planning and focus on taking pictures of the ring at any and all possible moments. when I was eating muddy buddies and decided they would make a great backdrop for a super blurry photo.

...and when I was sitting on the couch showing my phone Lindsay how excited I actually am and also how beautiful of an engagement ring model I am.

...and when my FIANCE (blogger just automatically capitalized that word idk how it happened) and I went to Target and I got sidetracked by all the pretty bridal magazines and decided to buy the only one that didn't cost $12.

I feel like when I sat down to write this post I had a point, but there's a really good chance that my only plan was to post lots of ring pictures because apparently this is what my life has become and you know what? I don't hate it.
I do hate how anything for a wedding is automatically 5 times more expensive than it would be normally. Like, oh you want to rent these tablecloths? $2.49 please. OH it's for a WEDDING? Please give me your right arm and first born child.
So basically, for the TL;DR version: wedding planning is hard and expensive and all I want to do is eat ice cream waffles and take pictures of my ring.

Monday, April 20, 2015

I said yes (a proposal story)

Because in the past I've been guilty of posting blogs that may have led you to believe I was engaged when really it was a friend who was engaged, let me just get rid of all doubt by being very honest:
Whenever I start to write down the proposal story I just kind of type words and delete, type and delete, because I just want to get it perfect, and also I get really distracted by the sparkle coming from my left hand. (Life is so hard.) But right now Keith is watching Underworld and I have no interest whatsoever in that movie, so I told myself I was just going to sit here and type until the story is finished.

First, there's some back story. In the summer of 2009 Keith was living in Southern California about 30 miles/2 hours from me, and someone suggested that we go to a place called Strawberry Peak one evening to watch the sunset. We did, and after making it up the terrifyingly curvy mountain road we decided it would be "our spot" and that in the future we should make it a point to go back up there every once in a while.

Keith had told me to "look like you're looking at something pretty." Remember this part; it'll come into play later in the story, I promise.

Well, then we broke up and I forgot about Strawberry Peak.

When Keith and I started talking again early last year, he told me where he was living, and then said it was about a 10 minute drive from that same Strawberry Peak! We went there again when I drove down to visit him, and that's where he told me he loved me for the second first time. We also went there for 4th of July to watch fireworks, but that was the last time we'd gone up there.

Until last week. Last Sunday Keith randomly suggested we go to Strawberry Peak again, and I was a little suspicious because it had been so long since we'd gone. For various reasons I was pretty sure he'd be proposing in April, and when he all of a sudden suggested we go back to our special place I was like, "OMG MAYBE I'M GETTING ENGAGED THIS WEEK." But then he said things that kept throwing me off, so by Wednesday I had convinced myself that it wasn't happening.

But that didn't stop me from making sure my nails were freshly painted and my cuticles hadn't been bitten in long enough that they looked presentable.

We got to Strawberry Peak a little before sunset and I needed to lie down for a few minutes because I was feeling really carsick (these winding mountain roads are no joke!), but then we started taking pictures because hello, it was a mountain sunset.

After taking gratuitious selfies, Keith said, "Ok, let's get up," and I followed him a few steps away from our blanket. We were standing there talking and cuddling (awwwwww) and all of a sudden he said, "Ok, hold on for a minute, I've got to do something."

And I peed my pants (jk but my knees definitely got weak).

He turned toward me and pulled me in close, and started whispering sweet nothings (what even are sweet nothings?) in my ear, and I started giggling and shaking like a maniac. He pulled away from me and started to kneel down, and my shaking got worse and I was biting my lip trying to stop the giggling, and then he stood up quickly and said,

And that's how Keith died. Just kidding, but I did spend about 3 full minutes slapping him and calling him a jerk, while he just stood there laughing and saying, "I totally got you! You thought I was going to propose!" And I kept laughing and slapping and laughing and slapping, and then I was really convinced he wasn't going to propose.

Then he said, "Okay, turn and look at the sunset so I can take a picture of you."
And I replied, "Oh, like the first time we came here and you told me to look like I was looking at something pretty?"
"Yeah, exactly."
"Okay, but if you're taking a picture of the back of me please make surer my hair looks ok."

And I stood there waiting for him to take the picture, and I remember thinking that the sky was so beautiful and I was so happy, and then I heard Keith say my name.

I turned around and my hands flew to my face and I gasped, because Keith was kneeling and holding out a small box with the most beautiful ring I've ever seen in it.

And I started giggling and shaking like a maniac. The next few minutes are kind of a blur, but I remember saying, "Oh my gosh, really? REALLY? REALLY?" and apparently Keith had to tell me to, "Control yourself so I can do this!"

And he proposed, and my hands were still on my face because I was giggling and shaking. And then I said "YES!" and he said, "You have to give me your hand," and he put the ring on.


Then we took a selfie and I'm just super disappointed that I don't look excited at all.

I always thought that when I got proposed to I would cry, and I'm really surprised that I didn't. I remember wiping away one tear but it wasn't a crying tear, it was a "I'm laughing so hard a tear came out." We sat on the mountain and he told me all about how he had driven up to talk to my parents the Sunday before (a 13 hour round trip) while I stared at the ring and kept leaning over to kiss him.

We waited to post it on social media because I wanted to make sure our families were told before seeing the announcement online, and waiting to be able to post it was basically torture. Then, when I was finally able to post it I took about 15 minutes to come up with a caption and a filter, and in the time it took me to post on Instagram Keith had texted all of his groomsmen and asked them to be in the wedding.

Guys have it so easy.

I am seriously so blown away by all the sweet words from everyone! Thank you all so much for sharing in our excitement and happiness. I keep replaying the moment I turned and saw him kneeling on the mountaintop, and it makes me smile every time. I am over the moon with happiness and I just can't tell you how much all of your kind words mean to me.

So if you'll excuse me, I need to go put some ice on my neck because it's getting a little sore from staring at my ring and my fiance.

Thursday, April 9, 2015

I only blog when my post is basically written for me

Dont all good blog posts start out with a really obviously edited picture of the blogger's face?
Too bad.

Once upon a time I turned into a horrible blogger and started posting only like, once every two or three weeks. This made me very sad because I genuinely love blogging and I have a billion and two things to blog about (that's not true, I think I only have like, six) but I'm having a really hard time sitting down and getting the posts perfect enough to publish. And my standards are extremely low so if I'm not posting then you just know anything I have in my drafts reeks of suckage. So you're welcome for protecting you from that.

Anyway, the other day my lovely friend Lindsay posted a questionnaire and then tagged some people who she wanted to answer some questions she asked and by some miracle she tagged me and now I present to you this list of totally random questions.

Don't say I never gave you anything.

If you could only read one book over and over and over and over again for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?

...geez, Lindsay, thanks for starting out with something so simple that requires absolutely zero thought at all NOT. For some reason I'm totally blanking on every book I've ever read and I can't come up with an answer. I think I'm going to go with The Lord of the Rings, because there's so much information in it that I think it would keep me busy and entertained for a very long time.

Also because if I remember correctly (which I almost always do) there's a song about Tom Bombadil that I could spend the rest of my life setting to music. And yes, I would vlog it OMG stop being so demanding.

What’s the happiest memory you can think of? What makes it so special?

This is like, another really difficult question. I feel like there's a "right" answer and that it should involve Keith. But honestly, one of the happiest memories that comes to mind is Christmas 2013, when my whole family was at my Grandma's house and I heard my niece really laugh for the first time. She was three months old and I was changing her diaper, and when I shook my head around she made the most angelic little giggles and tears sprung to my eyes. I'd wanted a niece or nephew for years and to finally have one, and then have her giggle at me at Christmas was just the most wonderful thing ever.

Also this one time when I bought a breakfast burrito and the store's credit card machine didn't work so I got it for free. That was like, really special and delicious.

Quick – you’re going to a fun cooking class with your best friend. What are you dying to learn to cook?

Souffle! Queso! Chocolate chip cookies that are always the perfect consistency! Casseroles! Anything, really! I'm a horrible cook.

What is your favorite song on Taylor Swift’s 1989 album and why? (Hint: the correct answer is “I Know Places”)

My favorite song is "This Love" because I can relate it to Keith's and my (NOT Keith and I's... that is NEVER correct) relationship. Favorite lyrics? Here.

This love is good, this love is bad
this love is alive back from the dead
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me.

I mean hello, we were apart for 4 years and then got back together... could this BE anymore perfect, Miss Chandeler Bong?

Then and now

What would you do if you were the sole survivor of a plane crash?

Well, that would depend upon where I ended up. I'm assuming you're assuming I ended up on an isolate island like in Lost (which I've refused to watch simply because it's basically a rip off of Gilligan's Island), in which case I would search for a cell phone or something I could use to let the rest of the world know where I was. Until I was found, I would probably work out a lot and try to write down everything that happened so when I was found I could write a really detailed story and get super rich once I went back to civilization.

Would you rather battle a man-eating minotaur blindfolded, or take on Homer’s cyclops with no weapons?

It sounds like I'm weaponless in both scenarios so I guess I'll go with the cyclops? I think my strategy would be to climb a rock and jump on his head and stab his eye out really quickly. It's a good thing I'm so coordinated because this is all sounding super easy *yawn* next question?

What is your biggest fear?

Being abducted and tortured. Especially because all the Saw movies and most other horror movies made it seem really easy for psychotic people to abduct innocent women and do terrible things to them.

Also, snakes.

Most importantly, was the dress white and gold or blue and black?

It was white and gold and I've seriously tried SO HARD to see it as blue and black but I JUST CANNOT.


And apparently now I'm supposed to tag people and come up with my own questions, which sucks for the tagees because I really don't feel like i'm good at coming up with questions. It reminds me of when I used to play truth or dare and I hated when people picked "truth" because my questions were always really lame like, "What's the weirdest food you like to eat?" But anyway, here you go:

-What's the weirdest food you like to eat? What made you start liking it? (See what I did there?)
-What's one movie everybody loves that you've never seen? Why haven't you seen it? Do you ever plan to see it?
-What's one beauty product you just can't live without?
-Tell us something people are usually surprised to find out about you.
-What's one thing that can always make you happy?
-What's the worst piece of advice you've been given?
-Tell us about a tv show that you think is extremely overrated.
-What are your favorite blog posts to write? What about to read?

And I'm tagging the following people (but really, anyone is welcome to join. It won't hurt my feelings. It actually might hurt my feelings if you don't participate and do you really want to be responsible for that? Didn't thing so):

Melanie at Ribbons and Rotor Blades
Lauren at Lot 48
Kalyn at Geez Louise
Kristie at Kristie's Blue Jeans
Breenah at By Breenah
Jessie at Just Jessie

Now, go forth and blog and stuff! Bye.