It took us about 36 hours to decide on a name, and you guys, I don't know how I'll ever be able to name a human being. NAMES ARE HARD. We discussed Napoleon (that was a very close second), Mr Whiskers, Spartacus, Ascot, and Gimli, but General Patton beat them all out. But like I said earlier, I mostly just call him "Cat!"
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
Posted by Jay T at 9:25 PM
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
|Clementine and Nostril.|
I did not name either of them.
They like to lick. FACES.
They're obsessed with Keith and the literally walk all over me. Both of them routinely crawl over my head to get to Keith and I have had their butts in my face too many times to count. Do you know what it's like to have a gigantic golden retriever crawl on top of your face to get to your husband? It's like being suffocated and stabbed at the same time. And she thinks she's really dainty but she's just a lumbering fool so it's sometimes hard to be mad at her when she looks like such a buffoon, which is even more annoying.
They smell. Actually, Nostril doesn't smell bad. Clementine, on the other hand, smells like a garbage factory. According to Becca is's a "musky scent that requires weekly baths" but in my opinion it's plain old high maintenance.
They lick their butts. Like, way too often for me to be comfortable with it.
I can't wait to get a cat who will hide behind corners and jump out and terrorize them the way they've been terrorizing me all this time.
Posted by Jay T at 8:41 PM
Monday, April 11, 2016
Rational is my middle name.
The dogs missed their dad and showed that by refusing to eat on Sunday. We skyped Keith Sunday night and the dogs really didn't know what to do with themselves. They kept cocking their heads and whining and doing their tricks just in case he magically apparated and appeared in front of them. Ignore the home mess but LOOK HOW CUTE THE DOGS ARE.
Baby Kate has a sister! She was born on March 8th and she has the biggest feet and the most amazing head of hair I've ever seen on a newborn. Her name is Kynlee Elizabeth and her favorite things are: 1) Sleeping. 2) That's all.
Baby Kate is a very concerned big sister. Whenever "Baby Sista" cries, Baby Kate gets upset and wants Kynlee to stop crying because when babies cry the world cries. Katelynne is convinced that Kynlee cries for one of two reasons: "She needs a Band-Aid!" or "She's hungwy and wants the boobies!"
In my opinion, Baby Kyn always looks like she's exasperated and it's adorable.
Posted by Jay T at 10:41 PM
I got it at a Sally Beauty Supply Store in the ghetto. Seriously, I think there was a drug deal slash robbery going down right outside before I walked in. I didn't research this product before buying it, I just went in and asked the saleswoman for a clarifying shampoo and this is what she showed me. I use it every other shampoo and I've got to say, I LOVE IT. My hair feels so light and clean! Definitely recommend this product. On alternate days I just use regular shampoo, and I buy whatever is cheapest at Target.
//Ion Keratin Smoothing Masque. This is the first fancy product my hairstylist suggested to me. I started off using it 2-3 times a week because of how dry and brittle my ends were. Now, I use it 1-2 times a week, depending on how often I wash my hair. My hair feels so much softer since I started using this! I leave it on for 4-5 minutes, or 2-3 songs on the Ella Henderson station on Pandora.
//Ion Keratin Conditioner. I use this every day that I don't use the keratin masque. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. It feels amazing and smells so so good! Plus, it has a pump top which is the most genius invention in the universe.
//BioSilk Silk Therapy. I've sworn by this product for close to ten years. I put it on the ends of my hair every single time I wash it and it also smells amazing and makes my hair feel silky smooth. If there's one product you go out and buy, make it this one. You can get it at Target for like $40/bottle or you can almost always find it at a TJ Maxx or Ross for under $20.
//L'Oreal Revitalift Eye Cream. Last year I started noticing these cute little wrinkles around my eyes and I was like I HAVE TO NIP THIS IN THE BUD. I've been trying different eye creams since Christmas, and so far I really like this one. I don't love that it comes in a tub, because I've read that tubs contain more bacteria than pumps, but with a tub I feel like you can really get everything out of it. So for now, I'm on board with this product.
//Lumigan. This is by far the Holy Grail of beauty products. I've been using Lumigan for a few years now and it's the best thing in the world. It's the generic form of Latisse, and it's ridiculously expensive. The only reason I'm able to use it regularly is because I have a friend who gets free samples at her job (she works for an eye doctor) and she shares with me. Lumigan is really for glaucoma, but I use it as eyelash steroids. I use one drop on each eyelash line per night, and my lashes are fuller, thicker, and stronger than EVER. That picture on the bottom left where I have red eyes and I also look like I have a bruise (IDK why it looks like that, I guess my eye cream actually sucks) is my lashes with nothing on them.
HOWEVER. If you stop using Lumigan for longer than a few days your eyelashes will fall out. I REPEAT: YOUR EYELASHES WILL FALL OUT. This happened to me twice because I was in between samples and it was awful. I literally had 6 eyelashes on each eye. They grew back just fine, but for a couple of weeks I thought my life was over.
//Rare Minerals Skin Revival Treatment. This product is kind of weird. I found a sample in my car a few weeks ago and started using it at night as directed, and I really loved it. It made it so when I went to bed I had a perfectly highlighted face, and I really like to think that it made my skin softer, too. So, when I ran out of the sample, I turned to Amazon to buy more.
This product is a powder moisturizer. It's super weird but I like it. It says it's supposed to make your pores look smaller and I REALLY feel like it does! I don't love how I feel like I'm going to sleep with powder on my face but when I wake up I feel softer than a baby's bottom.
Friday, April 8, 2016
Y'all. I got to spend a weekend in the South with Faith and Lindsay (and with a guest appearance by Natalie and her most perfect tiny human, Zoey). If you've never been to Texas, you really need to go. And if you go, you need to make sure you go with good friends, stretchy pants, and lots of space on your phone for pictures.
Since I didn't get into DFW until almost midnight on Thursday night, the recap of the trip begins on Friday. Although if you want to know, we spent a few hours after I got in enjoying nightcaps, playing with Lindsay's dumpster cats, and being in general disbelief that we were all finally together.
Friday, after Lindsay made us incredible breakfast tacos, we went to the DFW stockyards. While there we observed Texas Longhorns, "raced" through a maze which was featured on season 5 of The Amazing Race, imbibed in Tex-Mex and margaritas, and played tourist outside of Cowboys stadium and the Rangers stadium.
|Trying to get a picture with the Texas Longhorns. Total success, obviously.|
|Faith and Lindsay with the prizes we got for completing the hardest maze OF ALL TIME.|
|Actual photo of us during torture.|
|The REAL prize for finishing the maze: margs and Tex Mex!|
|When bloggers try to eat...|
|These childrens' rides are highly inappropriate to ride as an adult.|
Friday evening we enjoyed authentic Texas BBQ with our special guest: Zoey. I mean, Natalie and her baby Zoey. We went to Riscky's BBQ and when I ordered the all you can eat ribs, our waitress laughed at me. So I was like, "She doesn't think I'll get my money's worth from the all-you-can-eat ribs?? I'll show her!!!!" ...I ate seven, which really isn't impressive.
#MotherMaterial. I was drinking a hard cider. When I ordered it I was kind of embarrassed, because everybody else was drinking beer. Our waitress told me, "Well don't order it if you're ASHAMED of it!" So this is a picture of my shame cider.
|I LOVE THEM BOTH.|
After stuffing our faces and bellies with BBQ, Lindsay took us both to a piano bar. I'll admit (I didn't tell this to Lindsay or Faith) I was a little skeptical of a piano bar. I didn't really know much about them but Lindsay really talked it up so we were both like "OKAY."
We shared a fishbowl of alcohol and enjoyed the best few hours E.V.E.R. There was a bachelorette party going on so we got to watch all the party girls getting up on stage and making fools of themselves, we got to sing along to the classics like Journey and Billy Joel, and we got to have the most American night ever.
We got back super late, after having an awful Uber experience and then finally taking a van taxi home, and pretended to have a nightcap before we all just crashed for the night. We had to keep up our strength so we could continue our shenanigans the next day... shenanigans that started with BREAKFAST.
|Mr. Hess was present during breakfast. Shout out to Mr. Lindsay!|
Saturday afternoon we drove to Dallas where we did a drive by viewing of the JFK memorial (we did not get out because parking was a pain and we were tired, sorry JFK) and then we drove to Weir's.
Next Lindsay took us to jewelry/accessory mecca, AKA Sam Moon. IT WAS AMAZING and we all got so much amazing and cool jewelry! I totally get why Lindsay is obsessed with this place.
Next, we became BEST FRIENDS WITH BOB. "Bob" is queso with ground beef, avocado, and sour cream mixed in. BOB IS MY NEW BOYFRIEND. I love him so much I forgot to take a picture of him. But don't worry, I DID manage to photograph more margaritas.
|Faith got a picture of Bob, that sneaky minx. Middle left.|
Also thank you Faith for taking photographic evidence of the gluttony we enjoyed in Texas.
That evening we decided to try a buffet of Texas food so we drove through and took home:
-Chick Fil A
-Taco Bueno (or was it Taco Casa? I can't remember. We had one of them the night I got in and the other on Saturday night)
Plus, we had our fully stocked bar at Lindsay's house. We were not left wanting for food or drink, no siree. We watched Parks and Rec and had the most fun time ever just being together, talking, and laughing. SEE?