Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Some pros and cons of living with my parents

I've been living with my new roommates (coughmyparentscough) for a little over a week now, and for the most part, it's gotten a lot better. Maybe that's due in part to the sneaktails I've been consuming? Just kidding, I haven't been having very many sneaktails. Why are you so surprised about that?? I'm a busy person and I can't be bothered to be mixing drinks in my closet all night every night. Plus I keep forgetting to refill my stash.Today I want to write more about living with my parents, but I don't feel like writing out a whole post so it's a list with GIFs, which is one of my favorite kind of posts to write. YOU ARE WELCOME.

PRO: They have cable slash Netflix on the tv. 
This is great because I can lounge in the La-Z-Boy (I googled it and google told me that's how you write it out which looks weird to me but whatever) and binge on Mad Men. I didn't have cable at my apartment, so I was stuck with movies or watching Netflix on my phone, which wasn't the end of the world but it sure made playing Candy Crush while watching Netflix a little difficult.

Con: I can't actually watch it whenever I want to. 
The thing about sharing a TV with people is that apparently it's frowned upon to hog the TV. And now that fall TV is about to start, this is going to be an even bigger problem. I'm pretty sure that when I want to watch Grey's/Parenthood/Scandal/etc I'm going to have to wait until my parents are finished with their reruns of Newhart or Mary Tyler Moore (you think I'm joking but I'm 100% not) and I'm definitely not impatient. I'm also not good at sharing. Oh and my parents blocked FX, which is the channel Sons of Anarchy is on. SO I can only watch that show if I can find it online. LIFE. IS. HARD.

Replace the dark haired gentleman with a flatscreen TV and you have a pretty good idea of my life.

Pro: Free food! FREE FOOD!
I hate grocery shopping and I hate cooking. So it's kind of nice to know that if I want to, I can have a home-cooked meal in the evening and all I have to do to get it is venture out of my bedroom for 5 seconds.

Con: Free food! FREE FOOD!
Living alone was great because the only food in the apartment was the food that I bought (and the box of pancake mix I found in the back of the cupboard that I mixed with coffee creamer to make the most amazing pancakes in the universe). I didn't have to worry about late night ice cream or popcorn binges, because I didn't buy that food. Now that I live at home it's a lot harder to avoid the 6 open cartons of ice cream in the freezer or the open bag of shredded cheese in the fridge or the boxes of cereal in the pantry. What's self-control and where can I find some?

Pro: Free rent.
Need I say more?

Con: Just because it's free doesn't mean I'm not paying.
I love my parents, but ... they're parents. They can be a little overbearing. I should get up for work at my 6:08 alarm, but yesterday I was so tired that I decided to let myself sleep in until 6:22. Well, when my dad got up at 6:15 he came knocking on my door "just to make sure you're not late for work!" This was me when he woke me up:

His intentions were pure and I appreciate his concern but I made it very clear to my dad that "I am an adult and I can get myself up and out of bed and thanks but if you ever do that again I cannot be held responsible for the words that come out of my mouth or the anger you will face." It was great.

Also, did you know I share a closet with my parents? They literally use three closets in the house just for their clothes. WHY DO THEY NEED SO MANY CLOTHES? (Oh lord, who sounds like the parent now???) Half of my closet has my dad's dress shirts in it... they're like, finger spaced out so they don't get wrinkled. Do you know what finger spacing is? I think it's something they do at clothing stores... you put a finger in between each hanger to make sure they're all spaced evenly. That's what my dad does with his clothes in my closet. It's only a big deal because I have to make sure I don't hide my sneaktail ingredients in his side of the closet. 

Other things that don't deserve GIFs, only bullet points:
  • My mother asked me if I could maybe get a white loofah because my hot pink one doesn't match the decor in her bathroom. Guess what Target doesn't have? White loofahs. COME ON, TARGET.
  • My dad likes to ask me when I'm planning on washing my car. He looks at it every day and he can't resist making a comment about it. Um Dad, if it bothers you so much, you have the spare key to Bruce Wayne and you are more than welcome to drive it over to the car wash and take care of that for me.
  • If I'm in the living room watching TV and it's past 9pm my dad likes to say, "Juel, you should really go to bed soon. It's late and you have to get up early." STAHPIT.
  • When I leave dishes in the sink for longer than .02 seconds it's like my parents can sense it and they wash them and put them away because they don't like to leave dishes in the sink.
  • My dad is a whistler. He likes to whistle and hum all the time and you know what I hate? Listening to people whistle and hum.
*YOU GUYS PLEASE READ THIS IF YOU THINK I'M JUST BEING A BIG ANNOYING COMPLAINER AND YOU'RE STARTING TO HATE THIS: I love my parents and I truly appreciate them letting me live at home. They know how I feel about all of these things (minus the sneaktails) and we joke about it all a lot. They are not unreasonable and I am just being dramatic. I'm not trying to be a whiny brat but sometimes you just need to vent. Plus, GIFs.


  1. Okay your dad clearly needs to understand that those snoozing minutes early in the morning are sacred and disturbing a person mid-snooze is a crime punishable by Gollum face. Tricksy parentses. Ummmmm…I can’t whistle, but I hum ALL THE TIME and now I’m worried you’re going to hate me when we meet in person.

  2. Okay I want the Ron Swanson eating an ice cream cone gif to live on forever ETERNALLY. (Which I'm aware is the same as forever but you know - gotta get my point across at grammar's expense. Ain't no thang.)

    Also. Dude. Just guy a Roku. Then you can have Netflix and Hulu and all that shiz. We don't have cable either and the Roku is my FAVE. Do it. Just buy one.

    *This is not a sponsored comment.*

  3. Also I just re-read this entire post again. I think I AM your parents.

  4. Awww hahahaha, I love this! I moved two doors down from my parents and they are welcome to come over whenever but my mom seriously starts rearranging things. They came over last night and apparently she thought it was a GREAT idea to hide my coffee aka put it in the cupboard. I wanted to punch her this morning when I couldn't find it. As for the car washing, just tell your dad there is a drought... He should back off, mine did.

  5. I can relate! Whenever my husband and I stay with my parents, we store a box of wine in the closet...'secret wine!'

  6. As someone else who lives with their parents (for 2 years counting.... don't worry I'm about to change that) I have 3 words of advice: TV in bedroom. Once I got my own TV life became sooooo much easier for everyone. I even splurged and bought my own DVR box, so I can isolate myself in my room and it's like I'm not even there plus no drama over my recordings cancelling their recordings or vice versa.

  7. This just makes me remember all the things I HATED about living with Derek's family.... and makes me DREAD the possibility of having to move back in with them. I feel your pain, and the need for sneaktails.

  8. Pretty much all that stuff would drive me crazy. Especially the "for your own good" advice. Moving back home doesn't mean you stopped being an adult who was capable of handling your own life prior to that! (And there's my parent-living-with frustration, left over from 3 years ago)

  9. I can totally relate on the closet thing, when I had to move home whilst writing up my thesis my parents response was not, "we'd love to have you darling" but instead "your mum is going to miss the closet space, and she's not going to be happy because I don't want to share your brothers". Yes you interpreted that right this means they both use 2 closets!!!!

  10. haha I LOVE this! It reminds me of when I moved in with my parents after school. I moved out since, but jeeze.. I really, really, really miss that free rent. Sometimes I consider giving up my freedom to walk around in nothing but undies to move back in.. but I doubt they'll take my boyfriend & two dogs too!

  11. bahahahahah! No, i TOTALLY get it. My parents are the same exact way. Especially about the "waking you up early in the morning to make sure you're not late" and the "why are you still watching tv at 9pm?" thing. Well, they've gotten a bit better recently about the staying up late thing, but still. :p Living at home was nice and my parents are great and all that, but moving out? SUCH a wonderful thing.

  12. I hate whistling and humming too but your parents seem adorable. Also, I'm never moving home again for all of these reasons hahahaha

  13. I hate when I'm sleeping and hit the snooze button and my mom says I need to get up. Living with your parents can have it's ups and downs. But, I'm glad I get to spend time with my mom. However, I don't think I could handle not having my own TV.

  14. Wait? Are your parents my parents because all of these happened when I lived with my parents and it made me crazy so you certainly have my sympathies!

  15. i loved this,hilarious and true!! i love that your parents watch old classic tv shows...mine watch a lot of British tv shows on pbs :) but i won't lie,i do like downton abbey :) i live with my parents now too,it is convenient and a big blessing.

  16. When I moved back in my dirty car drove my dad NUTS and he was like "Why don't you wash your car??" and I said "Because I know if I wait long enough you'll do it AND vacuum it!"

  17. Your mom and loofah made me LOL so loud. Thank goodness my house has two stories and I have the 2nd story all to myself. However, while I think all of your points ARE SO VALID, my grandpa lives here too, so I have 3 parents, and well I win (or lose... I guess)

  18. Oh and if I hadn't just gotten this really awesome job, I might would have moved to SLO and we could have just lived together....

  19. I need my extra snooze time. I was complaining about never getting up for class in time so my boyfriend called me a million times instead of letting me sleep through it as if I didn't want the extra sleep. Also lol about Target not having the loofah because they have literally everything else.

  20. Grrrrrl. I would not be able to live with my parents. I love them to death. But no.

    My mom and I get along best when our sleeping under the same roof doesn't last more than a few days (or a Christmas vacation). I like to move at my own pace, full speed ahead for everything, except for cleaning which happens at a snails pace (or not at all...oops).

    I would be losing my mind after two weeks, without a doubt.

    Good luck to you.

  21. Okay seriously -- I LOVE that your mom actually asked you to go out and get a different loofah to match the bathroom decor! Ha! I'm the kind of kid though -- I would listen to that, and then go out and buy something even more obnoxious to drive the point home that I didn't care! LOL Like one of the kid ones with a plush animal head on it or some cartoon character. But I'm just the pain in the ass kid! ;)

  22. Um, I'm currently living with my in-laws and I TOTALLY FEEL YOU ON ALL OF THIS (well except sneaktails because I'm currently knocked up and apparently fetuses don't like booze). They have been pretty chill about it all but ohmygoodness I cannot wait to have our own space again!! Once we move into our new place I'm not going to wear pants for a solid week in celebration of having privacy again. I'm serious.


  24. I love this like a lot! I so admire you for living at home with your parent's. I love my parent's but I could NEVER do it

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  26. 1. why the ban on alcohol? my mom gets feisty when she doesn't get her arbor mist fix.
    2. why the ban on FX?