Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Just some TMI confessions

Vodka and Soda
I spent all of yesterday having some digestive issues that don't need to be discussed here. These issues prevented me from eating. I mean, I ate like two slices of banana in the morning and a couple of bites of egg for lunch but that was it. So this morning I was feeling super skinny (duh, I lost like 3 pounds yesterday) so I wore my slacks to work. Slacks that I haven't worn in like 10 pounds. They slipped on easily but now that I'm just sitting here they're like cutting into my stomach and my thighs and stuff and nobody is having a good time. Also I'm avoiding coffee for today so that's just not fun at all. Sorry. That was a lot of info.
Saturday is the Lady Antebellum concert Keith is taking me to. (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) I'm SO excited... but I have NO clue what to wear. I googled "what to wear to a lady antebellum concert" and apparently I should wear a sundress, a giant belt, and cowboy boots. I have exactly zero of those things. So I'm thinking maybe a sundress, a denim jacket, and sandals. Except I just googled what that looks like and I'm less than impressed. LIFE IS HARD.
Last night when Keith and I were on the phone he said something about how he's only looking forward to the concert because he knows it will make me happy (too sweet, vom), and I said, "I happen to know from my extensive stalking of you on Facebook when we were broken up that you went to a Toby Keith concert one time and SANG ALONG with Red Solo Cup. So shut up." He did.
My driver's license expires on Tuesday and I'm not planning on renewing it until Monday because I like living on the edge. Also I don't know how to renew it. I've never done it before. But I'm pretty sure it's a good idea to make an appointment if you do it at the DMV. And I'm pretty sure I don't have to take a test or have them retake my picture. At least I hope not, because I am prepared for neither.
I just had to try and explain to my boss how the Keurig works.
Last night one of my friends came over and I asked her if she wanted to borrow a pair of sweatpants. "The ones you wore last week are still over there on the floor where you left them. A week ago. Because I live alone and don't put my things away."
I have still been doing a great job of not eating bread, but last night I confessed to my friend who came over that, "I have cheated and had some french fries." French fries. Which are made from potatoes. Which are not bread. Which means that as you get older you can actually get dumber.
I AM GOING BACK TO BLONDE. And I'm nervous because what if it doesn't turn out the way I want it to? Then I've spend the past year letting my hair get back to natural for like, NO REASON. And that would mostly just be annoying.

22 comments:

  1. I'm impressed at your ability to avoid breads! I've also done the whole "oh I'm skinny enough to wear these old pants" and then after lunch am like, "how many hours until I can go home and take these off? Why did I wear these..."

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    1. How To Stop A Divorce And Save Your Marriage?(Dr.Brave).

      Hello to every one out here, am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me three days ago, My name is Jeffrey Dowling,i live in TEXAS,USA.and I`m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website http://bravespellcaster.yolasite.com,if you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to "bringing your ex back. So thanks to Dr Brave for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.{bravespellcaster@gmail.com} , Thanks.

      Delete
  2. CRAP I forgot about the no bread thing. Ignore my suggestion of buttered toast. Buttered French fries, perhaps? I vote you wear skinny jeans and a cute blouse to the concert. That’s what we (I) do in Texas.

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    1. Know what else they were in Texas... boots. Just like Google said.

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  3. I've been to many Lady A concerts, so I feel like I'm expert enough to give advice on this topic...... While the dress/belt/boots combo is completely appropriate (as are dress/denim jacket/sandals), it is also highly acceptable to wear skinny jeans or shorts and a cute top. Which is what I do.... because I don't own cowgirl boots or a belt or a denim jacket.

    If you do wear a sundress, make sure you don't wear a thong. Those of us with our bums covered will totally make fun when a wind (or rain or both) causes your dress to lift or become see-through.

    Anyway, have a blast at Lady A. I saw them last month and the concert is great!! They are my absolute favorite.

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  4. When are you getting your hair dyed?? You're going to have so much fun at the concert!

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  5. ^^ Jess seems like the person that could just plan my life for me and it would be a lot less complicated than I make it.

    Idk about California, but here in Oklahoma you go to the tag agency (not the DMV, even though that's where they always go on TV shows to renew their licenses. Trickery.) and you do have to retake your picture. But they zoom really close to your face so go with a slimmer hair style. I Dolly Parton curled my hair, and it looks like cousin it's drivers license... with an awesome ombre.

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  6. i am totally jealous that you get to go to a lady A concert..that sounds like so much fun!!

    and also, i have been finding myself wanting to color my hair blonder lately too! i'm just too cheap to do it, which is why i haven't yet. maybe i'll try to find a beauty school to do it or something.

    and i'm pretty sure that you can renew your driver's license at AAA just like you did with your license plates a while ago. which would be great, because then you can completely skip the DMV, aka the worst place on earth.

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  7. When I went to Lady A, it was snowing out. I still wore my cowboy boots! Have a blast!

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  8. Im on day 2 of a diet challenge that includes no bread or sugar and I literally think I am dying!

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  9. I'm over here stuffed into my Spanx feeling sympathetic for your tight pants! Can we get some non-maternity stretchy waistband pants that nobody can tell are stretchy?

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  10. Lady A concerts are a blast. I went to one a couple years ago, don't worry about what to wear because everyone at country concerts are too drunk to realize there are actually other people there. I wouldn't know this from experience though. Nope, not me, never.
    French fries are okay, this is the best thing ever!

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  11. I can't believe you have to go to the DMV to renew your license! In Pennsylvania they just mail us a form, and I fill it out and send it back with a check and they mail your new license (except omg now I'm panicking because I think I forgot to include a check in mine that I sent in last week, crap!).

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  12. which is exactly why i wear dresses and cotton stretchy skirts. aint nobody got time for feeling like a stuffed sausage!

    thanks for linking up!

    -kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  13. I just don't understand how people so how far up in companies don't know how to work things

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  14. So like I hate the fact that you can wear a denim jacket to what I'm assuming is an outdoor concert in JUNE. Here, girls usually wear as little as possible and by the time the concert actually starts they are all so drunk that it doesn't matter if they had on bikinis or mumus. If the concert is indoors, ignore that paragraph.

    Also. I hope your digestive issues improve and that Ralph learns how to make his own coffee.

    In NC, you have to renew your license at the DMV and you have to retake the test, the eye test and take a new picture. I'm sure that helps you none for CA.

    And finally, I really appreciate that you made "pounds" an amount of time. You're doing big things in life.

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  15. My birthday was May 20th. And I still haven't renewed my license. Hi, my name's Alexis and I like living on the edge every single day.

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  16. In Florida you can just renew your license online. I don't know about California, though. And just be aware if you do go to the DMV to do it that you need like your social security card, birth certificate, a bill with your name on it and the egg that will produce your future first born child. It's ridiculous.

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  17. Last night I asked my husband if he had his slacks packed. He laughed and asked if was 80 years old. Apparently no one says slacks anymore....so he says. I said, well I wear slack to work and he said, "Do you, Grandma?" When I said, what do you call your pants? "Pants". So then I asked how he distinguishes between different types of pants and finally said "I call them dress pants." Conclusion: my husband is a moron.

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  18. Have the best time at the concert tomorrow!!! Looking forward to the recap post!! :)

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  19. How To Stop A Divorce And Save Your Marriage?(Dr.Brave).

    Hello to every one out here, am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me three days ago, My name is Jeffrey Dowling,i live in TEXAS,USA.and I`m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(bravespellcaster@gmail.com}, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website http://bravespellcaster.yolasite.com,if you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to "bringing your ex back. So thanks to Dr Brave for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.{bravespellcaster@gmail.com} , Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Greetings My Dear Friends,

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    ReplyDelete