I DON'T KNOW IF YOU HEARD, BUT TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY. I'm 26 today and I tried to write out a really thoughtful and insightful and nostalgic birthday post but those aren't my forte. My forte is run on sentences and though-vomiting and that's what's happening today so HERE WE GO.
Ugh this was 3 years ago time goes fast I'm old now.
Twenty-six. Hm. That's how old my grandma was when she got married. Oh funny, that's also how old my mom was when she got married. OH FUNNY, that's ALSO how old my sister was when SHE got married! I am not getting married at 26, unless I elope but like, there's no way that's happening. Huh. I'm breaking the tradition. Oops. Sorry, family, I'm breaking tradition.
Twenty-five was a really great year. I loved 25. If you had told me the things that would happen during 25 on my 25th birthday I would not have believed you. I would have been like, "What? I'm going to date Keith again? Hahahaha that's a lie. That's not going to happen."
At the same time, there is some stuff about 25 that I'm more than happy to leave there. Twenty-five had one of the worst experiences of my life and I never would have thought that would happen, either. Gross. That part of 25, you can't sit with me.
Twenty-six. I love the number six. I love the way it sounds. NOT BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE SEX, YOU PERVERT. Great, now I'm going to get people finding my blog by searching "sounds like sex." Cool. You're older, but apparently you're not wiser. Geez.
I wonder what the most important thing I learned at 25 was? Hm. That's a good question. Well, I learned that going to bed by 10pm helps me to feel well rested. I learned that I suck at cooking quinoa. Like, I never make it right. It's always crunchy. But that's not very important. I guess I'll go with something cliche and say that I learned how important it is to have REALLY good friends. Friends who are there for you no matter what. I learned that I'm extremely lucky in that area of my life.
Twenty-six is going to have some really big changes, I think. MAYBE THIS YEAR I WILL FINALLY GET A CAT.
Really, Juliette? One of the things you're the most excited about for 26 is to get a cat?
YES BECAUSE CATS ARE FLUFFY AND ADORABLE AND THEY POOP IN A LITTER BOX AND THEY PURR.
Yeah but like what about shedding?
I'll get one that doesn't shed.
STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF.
Ahem. Moving on. So, for my birthday I am going to see The Fault in Our Stars. I'm going to cry on my birthday. THIS IS A GREAT PLAN.
I am NOT going to go out like I did last year... and I am NOT going to puke four times at work the day after my birthday.
Ooooooh I'm also going to start out 26 with a new driver's license. I don't get why the guy made me take a new picture. I mean what if I had just mailed in the form they sent me? I wouldn't have had to take a new picture, right? That's annoying. Also I came dangerously close to failing the eye test but I'm super wise now that I'm old and I didn't actually cover my left eye when the guy told me to, so I passed. Phew.
I wonder if the temporary license they gave me will work at a bar?
My answer to everything today will be, "Whatever. It's my birthday... gimme some cake."