Wednesday, April 30, 2014

What I learned from Mean Girls

If you're not aware, today is the 10 year anniversary of the most quoted movie in the history of movies. That fact is totally made up but also probably totally true. So, to celebrate, I decided to list some things I learned and then also list a few unanswered questions I've always wondered. Ready? Grool.
What I've learned from Mean Girls
1. Never let the haters stop you from doing your thang.
2. Happy hour is from 4-6.
3. You can't just ask people why they're white.
4. One of the highest compliments you can give a guy is to tell him his hair looks sexy pushed back.
5. The best way to get a girl to stop going out with your crush is to call her mom pretending to be Susan from Planned Parenthood and ask for Taylor to call you back because it's urgent, thank you.
6. If you put peppermint foot cream on your face, your boyfriend (whose hair is pushed back, le duh), will just want to make out with you in the cafeteria.
7. Going through a divorce is worse than having your carpal tunnel syndrome come back.
8. Halloween is an excuse for girls to dress slutty and nobody can talk bad about them.
9. ESPN isn't just a channel on TV.
10. You can't go to Taco Bell if you're on an all carb diet.
11. When somebody tells you that you smell like a baby prostitute (aka prostitot HAHA see what I did there), it's probably not a compliment.
12. The limit does not exist.
13. If you have sex, you will get pregnant AND DIE.
14. Mrs. George is not like a regular mom, she's a cool mom.
15. If your fake boobs are hard as rocks, you will not notice when your chihuahua starts sucking on them.
16. You can apparently still become Plastic even if you wear a men's XXL pink polo on a Wednesday.
17. Those rules aren't actually real except for the time Karen wore a vest, because that vest was disgusting.
18. Your boyfriend isn't allowed to kiss you when you have lipgloss on.
19. Fetch is never going to happen.
20. The production room above the auditorium is useful for a great many things.
21. Joining the Mathletes is social suicide.
22. If you like, INVENT somebody, you're totes allowed to crash the house party they're throwing while their parents are out of town.
23. Don't push somebody in front of a bus.
24. Ex boyfriends are just, off limits to friends.
25. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar.
26. If you're not sure what percentage of fat a food is, just get cheese fries.
BONUS: Questions Mean Girls left unanswered.
1. Did Cady ever give Damien his pink shirt back?
2. If only 8 people had shown up at Cady's house, would she have had enough cheese and crackers for them?
3. Who told Cady it was ok to wear a strapless dress with that pink bra?
5. Did Damien ever get to have the color hair he wanted? 
4. What was Janice's wig ACTUALLY made out of?
5. Did Gretchen Weiners ever wear hoop earrings again?
7. Does Gretchen Weiners ever get any?

24 comments:

  1. This is my most favorite post of all time. Four for you, Juliette. You go, Juliette!

    Made my day! :)

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  2. I don’t know who told Cady it was okay to wear that tacky bra with her strapless dress, but it has officially bothered me for 10 years. Also I forgot to wear pink today…I totally can’t sit with you.

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  3. Love this. Can I share on my personal FB?

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  4. This really makes me want to watch Mean Girls!

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  5. I'm stuck at work for another 7 hours and all I wanna do is watch Mean Girls :( I even remembered to wear pink today in honour of this momentous occasion. No movie will ever top this one

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  6. Seriously, one of the greatest movies of our lifetime and I can't believe it's already the 10th anniversary!

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  7. this whole post makes me feel really good about my life. is that weird?

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  8. OMG this post totally just made my day SO FETCH!

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  9. The strapless dress with the pink bra has bothered me since the very first time I watched it! Maybe that's how you dress in Africa, but NOT IN AMERICA
    From Mississippi With Love

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  10. Eek! I have to go home and watch it now. I can't believe it's been ten years. Is it wrong that I find "Mean Girls" the best girl movie?

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  11. It is definitely the most quoted movie on this blog. That I know for sure.

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  12. Amazing. I used to get so pumped in calculus when I could answer the limit does not exist

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  13. Omg this is great! I absolutely love this movie! I can believe it's been out for 10 years!

    Kristin
    Crumbs & Curls

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  14. Best movie ever! Can't believe its been 10 years. *sobs because I realize how old I am*

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  15. Most important question here!! When is the Mean Girls reunion movie gonna happen?!?

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  16. GREAT post, Juliette! Who doesn't love Mean Girls!?!

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  17. Bahahahahahahaha. Yes, yes, yes, and YES.

    Also, FOUR FOR YOU J-COCO.

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  18. Fetch already happened.. and it's happening right now. Also, I'm sad I didn't get to do this. THANKS PLAGUE VIRUS.

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  19. I love this! I did not wear pink on Wednesday but I remember this movie like it came out yesterday. I need to watch this right now!

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