//Don't use your cell phone while you're driving (it's illegal in California). And if you get a ticket for it once, don't do it again and get a second ticket.
//Don't ever shave your eyebrows. It's not a good look for ANYONE.
//Don't cut your own bangs.
//Don't drink on an empty stomach. Or do. Just maybe not in excess.
//If your gas light comes on don't try and see how long you can drive before you run out of gas.
|Pretend like this gif works.|
//Don't try and sing karaoke on a Monday night after you've chugged four AMFs. Especially don't try and sing "Like a Virgin" and "Smooth" if you don't actually know how the song goes. Your roommate will have to hold you vertical on the stage so you don't fall into the drummer and then the bouncer will suggest you leave. On a Monday. Before 10pm. And you will take a nap next to a tree.
//If you haven't run at all in the past year, don't sign up for a 5K "just for fun." It's never fun.
//If your boyfriend takes you to the drive in to see District 9, don't fall asleep five minutes in. He'll be mad at you.
//Always pay your bills on time. Especially if the bill collectors have your parents' home phone number and they can call them and then your parents find out how irresponsible you are and it's awkward all around.
//You will never wear purple corduroy capri pants. Don't buy them.
//Don't ever put your hand through a window.
//Candy is a horrible dinner. Delicious for five minutes, but horrible.
//NEVER MIX ALCOHOL. JUST DON'T DO IT.
//Don't ever make excuses to keep dating a guy, especially if every time you talk to him you end up in tears.
//Don't place your worth in a man.
//Don't go for "just one more shot." It's never just one more and it's never worth it.