No. I've never actually been to a real school. I was homeschool through high school and then I went to a small private college. Ok. I know what you're thinking. No trust me, I know. You think I'm a homeschooled jungle freak who's a less hot version of Regina George, right?
Well, I wasn't a jungle freak. We don't even HAVE jungles in California. You'd probably know that if you were homeschooled. Ahem. Anyway. For the most part I loved being homeschooled. Sometimes I hated it, because I never got to pass notes in class (although I did have an imagination and I'd sit at my desk in my room and pretend like I was in a classroom and pass notes to myself) and I never got a locker. I REALLY wanted a locker. Even though I don't know how I would decorate it because the only male celebrity I could think of in middle school was Ricky Martin.
BUT, it was great because while you were busy being at school looking presentable at 8:30 in the am I was busy being at the kitchen counter for breakfast at 8:30 in the am and hardly even being awake. Our rule was that we had to be "dressed" for breakfast, and if we weren't then we couldn't eat anything until noon. My siblings and I got around that rule by throwing on a sweatshirt over our pajamas and coming to the counter for breakfast. I'm sure my parents knew what we were doing but they followed the whole "choose your battles" rule. And I'm glad they did. But trust me, there were a few mornings when I didn't wake up in time for breakfast because I was too tired from staying up late reading in the bathroom and I didn't feel like waking up for breakfast.
Also I had a 9pm bedtime until I was like, 15. Also when I got in trouble my parents threatened to not take me to the library. But like I said, not a jungle freak.
Anyway, where was I? Whenever I tell people I was homeschooled I usually get variations of the same few reactions:
"But you're so NORMAL!" Thanks. I try. I never know whether to be flattered or offended by this question.
"How did you have any FRIENDS?" Um, this cool thing called opening my mouth and talking to the other kids on the block or playing sports and interacting with regular human beings. Also my county had several homeschooled families and we'd all get together and have our own classes. Cooking classes, research paper classes, art classes, sewing classes... and this one time we got to all have fake wounds put all over us so we could help a hospital practice how they would act during a mass tragedy. Look at my cool yellow shirt and leggings.
"Did you like, grow up on a FARM?" No. But I did go to this lady's house and feed the calves with a bottle on several occasions.
Did you know that technically a "heifer" is a cow who hasn't given birth yet? So hi, I'm a heifer.
Instead of going to school for 6 hours a day, we could finish our work as quickly as possible and on most days I was only working from about 9:30 to 12. After that we had to learn how to entertain ourselves before our friends got out of school. We got pretty creative, like one time one of our rabbits had babies and the dad rabbit ate all the babies except four so we took the four in the house and brought the mom in every 4 hours to feed the babies.
We played games...
And eventually I decided to become and entrepreneur and I had a lemonade stand and sold lemonade to all the tired and thirsty kids as they were walking home from school. I was pretty successful and I think one month I made a whopping $17.
Other common questions:
"Did you go to prom?" Yes. I begged and begged my parents and they finally let me go with my friend Kim. After prom somebody told me my picture was in the school newspaper and everybody was like...
"So you didn't have a graduation?" Oh no, I did. It was in a church and my graduating class was three people. They played pomp and circumstance and I got a diploma AND EVERYTHING.
So let's recap: not a jungle freak, got to sleep in, didn't miss out on "regular kid" activities, had lots of friends from our homeschool group and sports, and passed notes to myself in my bedroom to feel like I was a part of a classroom. Also I had a secret boyfriend when I was 16. He was 23. It was totally scandalous and that's another story for another day.