Friday, January 24, 2014

I almost made my apartment collapse

Today I'm going to tell you a story of when I took a bath last week and almost made the apartment collapse.

It was Friday and I figured that the best way to decompress from the stress of the week was to take a bubble bath with candles, bubbles, a book, and some adult juice. And it was glorious. Because bubbles.


I'm trying to only wash my hair a few times a week so.... shower cap. Ben doesn't know about the shower cap. Ben might never know about the shower cap.

Anyway, I'm in the tub and the water is filled up as high as it can go and I'm enjoying my book and Enya is on Pandora and it's the most relaxing thing ever, but like every 5 minutes I notice the water level has gone down a few inches, making any appendages that weren't submerged feel a little chilly. So I kept having to refill, and I just figured I'd gotten a crappy tub stopper at Target. Whatever, right?

Refill and bask. Refill and bask. Refill and bask.

After I'd gotten out of the tub (because I ran out of hot water even though Ben fixed the water heater a couple of weeks ago) I was taking my sweet time with my skin care regime so I didn't hear the disaster that was occurring downstairs. Ignorance was such bliss.

I heard a dripping sound. But not like drip ... drip ... drip... no. It was dripdripdripdripdripdripdripdrip and I ran down the stairs (in a towel) to find out what it was. When I got downstairs I saw water dripdripdripdripping out of the light fixture in the living room. The light fixture that was directly beneath the bathtub. Obviously there was only one rational thought: THE APARTMENT WAS GOING TO COLLAPSE A LA SEASON ONE OF BREAKING BAD. (If you don't know what's falling out of the ceiling ... I'm not going to tell you. You don't want to know.)

There was a wet spot on the carpet that was at least 2 feet in circumference (diameter? I hate Geometry)(Is that even Geometry? I told you I hate it) and growing. AND GROWING. So I did the most logical thing: I cried. I mean, any relaxation I had achieved was now gone because our ceiling was about to cave in, obviously. But I pulled myself together, put a pot under the dripping to catch the water, and called my landlord.

Me: Hi, this is Juliette. Uh, sorry to call on a Friday night but I'm having a little problem... see, I was using the bathtub and now there's water leaking out of the light fixture in our living room. Like, a lot of water.
Landlord: Oh, was somebody using the bathtub?
Me: Yes. Like I told you, I was just using it.
Landlord: Oh. Well, how high did you fill up the tub?
Me: I don't know. (I did know.) Like close to the top.
Landlord: Well, did it go past the silver thing in between the faucet and the drain?
The silver thing in the middle is what he was talking about. The bottom half of the silver thing isn't totally sealed. DON'T ASK ME WHY I'VE BEEN WONDERING THAT FOR A WEEK.

Me: Yes. Yes it definitely went past that.
Landlord: Oh. Haha. Well, see the bottom part of that silver thing isn't sealed to the tub so if water gets above it, it will just drain out. At least it found somewhere to go so it's not just sitting in the pipes or something? I guess it would just sit in the pipes. I don't really know. Anyway, it's kind of funny because a lot of people have been having this problem lately. Ha ha. I guess baths are just getting really popular now. Ha ha.
Me: Oh yeah that's hilarious. (I was lying.) Um, well maybe I just forgot that you mentioned it but I really don't remember you telling us about this when we moved in. Anyway, what should I DO about this??
Landlord: Oh I didn't tell you about it. It didn't seem important. There's not really anything you can do. Just put a pot there to catch the water and don't turn the light on for the whole weekend. (That light fixture is the only light in our living room. So that was going to be fun.)
Me:
Landlord: Ok well call me next week and let me know how everything's going, bye!
Me:

We survived without the light, our ceiling didn't cave in, and I haven't enjoyed a bath since then. Thanks a lot landlord, for withholding information from me. I guess my next move is to call him again (or have Jacey call him ahem) and make that stupid silver thing seal all the way because I NEED MY BATHS DAMMIT.
 photo ScreenShot2013-06-23at112320PM_zps46bb1b5d.png

32 comments:

  1. THAT PICTURE OF YOU IS JUST THE FUNNIEST THING EVER AND IM SO MAD THAT YOU DIDNT SNAP ME THAT WHEN IT HAPPENED.

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  2. my nephew thought it would be cute to fill the tub with water to play with his toy boats right before they were leaving to go somewhere and then he forgot about it and ended up leaving the thing running for FOUR HOURS. needless to say, they had to get their ceiling redone. and he got his ass kicked.

    kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  3. This recently happened to me, except it leaks into my neighbor below me. It's NOT supposed to do that, by the way. That silver thing is there to HELP catch the excess water, not drip it somewhere else. It sounds like your drip pan is backed up and has gotten so full that it it's overflowing. Mine is the same way. They said, "Sorry. Just don't take a bath." Big, fat, stupidheads..

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  4. That picture made me laugh so hard. No need to feel bad about it. I flooded my parents' house a few years ago and they had to have drywall replaced and everything. Oops.

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  5. You are just really the prettiest person that ever wore a shower cap..

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  6. Hahaha! I'm sorry girlie to laugh but this was an awesome post in how you recalled the whole story. I would have freaked out just like you! I took a bath the other day and I was thinking about that and hoping that it wouldn't leak on the bottom floor. I live on the third floor (top floor) so I was hoping that no neighbors would come knocking while I'm trying to relax with my wine and Pandora. I couldn't fill it all the way past the silver thing because my water heater sucks and it wouldn't stay hot so I had to stop filling it. Now I'm gonna check to make sure it is sealed. I hope they get your issue fixed because he shouldn't downplay your situation and just shrug it off! We need baths and that's a must!! It's your American right :P

    Have a good weekend hun!

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  7. oh wow that's crazy!! I have to admit I'm giggling, but I hate that happened for you! I'm allllll about some shower cap-ness!

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  8. holy shit i would have freaked out!!!! good thing it didn't collapse. i'm totally chicken little about stuff like that!

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  9. I love the shower cap! Normally the excess water is supposed to drip into something that.. well I don't really know but it gets rid of it and it's not supposed to leak and go downstairs.. The landlord should probably fix that because it could turn into a huge problem ha ha. Glad it didn't collapse!!

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  10. OMG! That's insane! Your posts always crack me up because I get so into the story. Glad it wasn't worse but he should be worried about the water in the ceiling becoming mold, shouldn't he? You might want to get him to fix that stat... lol.

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  11. Yeah, I would tell him to get over there with some silicone and gel that shit closed! It could totally start a mold problem if it doesn't dry properly.

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  12. Yeah...ummm...your landlord is an idiot. That is supposed to drain the excess water, not let it flood your ceiling. That means something is wrong with your plumbing. If you still want baths though, they sell this plastic cover at Bed Bath and Beyond that seals around the whole silver thing. You just have to be careful not to overfill before you get in.

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    1. THIS. Exactly what I was going to say.

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  13. That picture is amazing! I totally would have jumped to the same conclusion that the ceiling was about to collapse, even after the landlord assured me it wasn't I would have avoided sitting in the room with the lamp for days just to be sure lol

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  14. what a caring land lord? smh. ugh got to love it. i'm glad you made the experience fun.

    Come view my vlog and let me know what you think of personally. http://pinkowl07.blogspot.com/2014/01/vlog-post.html

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  15. Haha! i love it. You would think that the landlord would have told you. Pesky landlords.

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  16. this is funny only because i've been in your shoes and have actually had water leak all over before too! not to a lower level but out of that hole thingy! i never knew what it was for, but i'd always hear it stealing my scolding hot water and it'd make me made! note to self: watch out for that seeping hole!

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  17. Well, at least he's not an easily flustered person... right?! AND as soon as I read the title of this post I was picturing that scene from Breaking Bad so I'm super glad you used that gif. Even though I never want to see that scene again EVER. That's the stuff nightmares are made of.

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  18. Um, great landlord you got there. And I love the picture of you in the shower cap; very chic.

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  19. The shower cap picture is by far the best picture ever. Also, you're so kind. I would have called and pitched a huge bitch and made that little landlord come and fix it immediately. You're much too kind!

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  20. First, give me your eyelashes and eyebrows. Second, screw your landlord. What a dick. Doesn't he KNOW HOW IMPORTANT BATHS ARE???

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  21. Oh my goodness, I would cry if I couldn't take my bubble baths! :(

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  22. This is hilarious- and yet I'm still jealous of your bath! Bathtubs certainly are not a popular appliance in Europe, so I've had to live without for months!

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  23. I've been taking baths lately with it being so cold and when the pipes start creaking I have the same fear! Like I am going to collapse from my third floor apartment all the way to the first. Or be like Cleveland from Family Guy and the tub falls out of the house!

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  24. UNFORGIVABLE! Baths are my everything. Was there any dripping that one night when I got really drunk and you had to give me a bath after I puked on your sidewalk? LOL (classy). You were so sweet to hold my hand the whole time :)
    xoxo, Cristen
    http://pinkrosesandpencils.blogspot.com

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  25. That gif is perfection with this story! I can't believe he was so whatever about this. Couldn't some $5 caulk from Home Depot have fixed that for anyone with this issue so he didn't get calls from tenants on Friday nights? I mean I'm no expert but I do watch HGTV so I kind of am...

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  26. omg , that's hilarious. At the other hand , I certainly want to kill the landlord for keeping it a "funny" secret. Jerk.

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  27. I'm still annoyed with your landlord about this.

    BUT I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU USED THAT BREAKING BAD GIF. Perf.

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