|Yeah T-Swift, I'm looking at you.|
|It's how I've managed to stay single this whole time.|
-At the gynecologist's office. A guy has no business being in a gyno's office unless he's the actual gynecologist. And if he is, well, you don't want to date him because just think about what he spends all day doing. Just no.
-At a bar after 1am. If a guy starts macking on you at a bar after 1am I have news for you: he's looking for a hook up and nothing else. And he's probably completely hammered and will end up throwing up on you at some point during the night a la reverse 40 Year Old Virgin. "Did you have shellfish?" Don't let a guy you've known for three hours puke on you. Don't be that girl.
-In Victoria's Secret. There are two reasons why a guy would be in Victoria's Secret. Either 1) he's there shopping for his significant other, or 2) he's a total creep and recently watched John Tuker Must Die. You don't want to date this guy.
-At Barnes and Noble. I know it sounds romantic and perfect (or maybe it just does to me?), but it's not going to happen. You will not be sitting in a chair reading
Drinking and Tweeting and Other Brandi Blunders Fifty Shakes of Grey Moby Dick when your dream guy comes up to you and starts chatting you up about the great novel you're reading and you will not go to Starbucks where he buys you an upside down caramel macchiato and you will not be married for the next 60 years.
It's not happening.
And to be on the safe side, you probably shouldn't count on meeting a guy at the nail salon, in a dark alley, at a tanning salon, at a car dealership, hitchhiking on the side of the road, in a bowling alley, at a wine bar, at a softball game, at a baby shower, or at a museum. Really, you're probably just SOL no matter what, and that's probably for the best. This way you don't have to share your wine.
PS: You can tell me if you're the exception to any of these places.
I won't judge you.