Thursday, May 16, 2013

Texts on a Thursday

Jacey is on vacation for TWO WHOLE WEEKS visiting family. AND GOING TO DISNEYWORLD. On the one hand, that really sucks for me. On the other hand, she's visiting her 5-year old brother who is HILARIOUS and that has provided me with some text messaging GEMS that I'm really excited to share.






Jacey: I want a milkshake
Me: I got an ice cream cone
Jacey: My car is going to in n out and I can't stop it
Me: That's exactly how I got to McDonald's!
Jacey: It must be a Honda thing

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Jacey: Something embarrassing happened
Jacey: Each seat has a little tv and you can slide your card for a movie and I tried and put my card in the wrong spot and it got stuck and the flight attendant had to help me take the tv apart




Me: Are you having fun?
Jacey: Yes. I ate Chinese food and played with Jake and now I'm in bed trying to conquer jet lag
Me: It's only 8:20. Good luck.
Jacey: You're not allowed to think that way. It's 11:23 and it's time for bed.

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Jacey: I told Jake he could take a nap and he said "don't be ridiculous I'm a big boy."
**Attached was this photo**

**These were sent while they were at King's Island, which is an amusement park (I think)**

Jacey: He's not cooperating
Me: He's annoying me
Jacey: He's annoying me too
Jacey: He ate all the snacks
Jacey: Also he made me go on a log ride and he said we wouldn't get wet
**Attached was a photo of the two of them, dripping wet. Jacey frowning, Jake grinning**
Jacey: I said "you lied" and he said "I'll feel guilty in a couple days"



**Still at King's Island**

Jacey: 5 year olds run a lot. I don't. It's a problem

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Jacey: Jake thinks it's necessary to tell every person we come in contact with that I'm his sister not his mom.
Me: Hahahahaha
Jacey: The long version if he can get someone to listen is, "this is my sister not my mom even though she's old and she lives in California" but if he's feeling pressed for time, "SISTER NOT MY MOM"



Jacey (at 7:04am): Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
Jacey (at 7:29am): Ok for this long distance friendship to work you are going to need to respond quickly

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Jacey: Ugh there are painters here and I'm eating my sandwich in silence because I don't know how to turn the tv on and the guy just moved his ladder RIGHT in front of my window and we keep awkwardly making eye contact

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Jacey: me: "Jake what position to you play in baseball?" jake: "Ready position."
Jacey: he's very literal


Jacey: Have you ever looked in the mirror when you're trying to put leggings on?
Me: No. Why would I do that?
Jacey: It was an accident. I know better. It was so bad.

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Jacey: Want to know what he [jake] said last night?
Me: duh
Jacey: We were laying in his bed reading books having special brother sister time and he says "i just stuck my finger in my ear and tasted it ... wanna try?" and he put his slimy little finger in my face. I said, "no thank you, you're disgusting" and then he laughed.


Jacey: Jake won't wake up
Me: Did you shake his shoulder?
Jacey: Yes. And I whispered "timmmme to wake up!" in his ear
Jacey: And I offered him a cookie
Jacey: And I tickled his armpits
Me: Is he breathing?
Jacey: Yes. And drooling.
Me: Pick him up
Jacey: He's sooooooo heavy



Jacey, even though you've kept me laughing through your absence, I'd appreciate it if you bailed on Disneyworld and came home. It's not that great, trust me. I mean, I've never been there but I've heard stories. It's basically just DisneyLAND but bigger and with alcohol and stuff. You don't need it. If you come back I'll buy you screw top wine and brie cheese and we can watch pitch perfect or friends or netflix and I'll spend the night* at your house and it will be SO FUN.

But if you for some reason can't just drop everything and come home then I'll understand, but you'd better bring me back a really good present. And it better not just be a Chippendale's nail file.

*I'll stay until 9pm.

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